Ra-ra-races

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Look! A horse!

It’s a curious thing, going to the races in the ‘off season’. Well I guess it’s not so much the ‘off season’ as the 51 weeks of the year when not every man and his sister’s dental hygienist are trackside.

There are no crowds:

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You get served drinks in actual glasses:

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Fancy!

The food is… the same:

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Delicious

And headwear isn’t mandatory:

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Claire, Me, Bec

We headed to the races on Saturday for Scotty’s birthday celebrations. Scotty is Bec’s boyfriend and a keen punter.

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Unfortunately I missed the memo re colourful dressing. Don’t they look fab:

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The Carmen Mirandas

Thankfully Claire gave me some advice on incorporating more fruit into my wardrobe, or appears to be doing so in this photo:

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“You’ve got the wedges down, it’s just the dress…”

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We stayed for a few hours, won $12 on three $3 mystery bets which we used to fund our hot chips. We then did what any sensible day drinkers do and went home for a nap before the evening activities.

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Bananas. How was your weekend?

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3 must try Easter baking recipes

1. Chocolate hot cross bun bread and butter pudding
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I made this two Easters ago for a dinner party and it was very well received. I shall be making it again this year. It’s all gooey and chocolatey and amazing. (recipe and image from taste.com.au)

2. Lemon and passion fruit cheesecake Easter eggs

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I meant to make these last year and failed miserably/got lazy. I imagine they are deliciously tangy and being so simple I have no excuse not to whip up a batch this year. (recipe and image from thelondoner.me)

3. Cadbury creme egg brownies

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There is no shortage of Cadbury creme egg recipes floating around the interwebs; creme egg cheesecake, pudding, cupcakes, cakes, slices etc. I think the brownies are the way to go this year. (image and recipe from sittingprettyatmydesk.com)

Need more? 17 Scrumptious creme egg recipes

What are you doing for Easter? I’m doing NOTHING (except for eating). And I’m very excited about it.

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Oreo fudge cheesecake

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I know I say this every time I post a new recipe, but I think this might be the best thing I’ve ever baked. For reals. The idea and look for this cake came from this website, but I wasn’t very impressed with the recipe, or any other recipes I found, so I made this one up by adapting the Choc Cherry Cheesecake I made last year.

For the cake and base:
– 250g Oreos for the base
– 80g butter, melted
– 500g cream cheese, softened
– 3/4 cup caster sugar
– 2 eggs
– 300g sour cream
– Teaspoon vanilla extract
– 200g Oreos for the cake, roughly broken
(one Oreo packet is 150g, I bought 3 packets, approx one and a half for the base and the rest in the actual cake)

For the topping:
– 100g sour cream
– About an 1/8 of a cup of sugar
– Homemade or good quality store bought fudge sauce
– Mini Oreos

Preheat oven to 160°C/140°C fan-forced. Grease a 5.5cm-deep, 24cm base springform pan. Process 250g of Oreos until mixture resembles fine breadcrumbs, I used a hand-held blender. Add butter. Process to combine. Press mixture over base of prepared pan. Cover. Refrigerate for 30 minutes.

Using an electric mixer, beat cream cheese and sugar until smooth. Add eggs, 1 at a time, beating to combine. Beat in vanilla and sour cream until just combined. Fold in broken Oreos. Spread over biscuit mixture.

Bake for 35 to 40 minutes or until centre is just firm. Turn off oven. Cool in oven for 3 hours with door slightly ajar. Refrigerate overnight.

For the topping mix the sour cream with the sugar and then spread the mixture over the top of the cake. Then warm the chocolate fudge and using a piping bag (or a plastic sandwich bag with a hole poked in one of the corners), decorate the sides of the cake. Add mini Oreos to the top.

This is what the cake looks like naked:

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Not great… I haven’t mastered the art of baking a cheesecake that doesn’t crack. Any tips?

I had absolutely no desire to make my own fudge sauce, which is rather unlike me. All the recipes I found had a million ingredients, so I settled on this ‘devilishly delicious’ option from Woolworths. Just put some in a bowl, zap it in the microwave for about 10 seconds and it melts into a runny sauce.

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^ Like a proud mother. And just a few more gratuitous cake shots:

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Go forth and bake! You shan’t regret it. Want more Oreo recipes? Check out the time I made Slutty Brownies. Also: 20 Cheesecakes to Dream About Tonight.

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3 surprisingly good celebrity song covers

1. Blair Waldorf (Leighton Meester) from Gossip Girl covers Dreams by Fleetwood Mac

Who knew Queen B had such great pipes? Thanks Bec for sending me this.

2. Paloma Faith does Sexy Bitch Minx by Akon

This is completely obscene. How Paloma takes Akon’s trash and turns it into a slow, sensual and strangely sad but soulful song is ridiculous.

3. Miley ‘Hillbilly’ Cyrus does Joelene with Dolly Parton

Miley really should have stuck to her Hickville ways, it just works so well.

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Fun at the fair

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On Saturday afternoon Bec and I took ourselves off to enjoy the family fun on offer at the Kalgoorlie-Boulder Community Fair.

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After struggling to understand the complex height requirement for The Sizzler (and why Betty Boop was involved), we decided to play some sideshow games. We had seen a small child with a plush banana toy, complete with seedy grin and sunglasses, so we went off in pursuit of a couple to call our own.

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We found a darts game with the coveted banana toy prizes so I tried my hand at hitting the balloons with a bunch of darts. Behind each balloon was a number, to get the banana I had to get something like 30 points.

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My low scoring performance was not at all helped by questionable advice from the carnies, or by my serious game face:

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In the end all I won was a stupid lei. At least the carnies let me have my photo taken with one of the bananas.

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After that Bec spotted another game with the bananas. Throwing aside all regard for occupational or public health and safety, this game involved throwing a hard ball at a bunch of glass beer bottles. After bartering the glass game carnie down to $6 for three balls each Bec started us off.

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Throw that ball Bec.

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Again it was much harder than it looked.

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Thankfully the carnie took pity on us, giving us extra turns and eventually feeling so bad for our dismal throwing skills that he gave us a banana each anyway!

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SUCCESS! Bec celebrated with some shooting, which she was alarmingly skilled at…

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After all the excitement of the sideshow games we went off to look at some more traditional show displays, like the prize winning preserves:

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And poultry:

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We then picked a ride to go on. At $10 a ticket we wanted to make sure we got a good one. We decided the SuperBowl ride was the perfect measure of both scary fun and structural integrity.

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Plus you get to sit in a giant American football helmet!

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Bec and I cackled like witches for most of the ride, it was hilariously fun spinning around and being thrown about. Then she went a bit quiet towards the end and I was worried breakfast might be repeated…

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But Bec was fine, so we celebrated with a couple of deep fried hot dogs on sticks, get a load of how excited I am:

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They were disgustingly delicious. I wish I had one right now.

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After that we picked up our Bertie Beetle showbags, an Aussie classic. Bec told me we had to get them right at the very end so we didn’t end up carrying them around all afternoon. This brought back scarring memories of missing out on the Groovy Inflatables show bag at the Royal Melbourne Show circa 1999 by following the same logic.

Luckily that didn’t happen again.

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Relieved I said hello to a couple of alpacas on the way out.

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A very fun afternoon that brought back lots of childhood memories, not all of which were traumatic and involved missing out on the best show bag .

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The Weekend

 

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Here is a ridiculously extensive list of what I did on the weekend: went to a short film festival, lived through two earthquakes, ran 5km in less than 30 minutes, voted in the WA Senate election re-run, went out for breakfast, ate deep fried hot dogs at a fair, went to the races, napped, went gangbusters with Em in the photo booth at an engagement party (see above), had conversations I can’t recall at the Gold Bar, ate pizza at 2am, carb loaded with comfort pasta, watched Matilda, went and observed local football, watched one of the worst movies of all time (details to come), ate dinner. The end.

How was your weekend? Got a list to rival mine?

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30 thoughts I had during this morning’s coffee run

1. Coffee coffee coffee coffee coffee.
2. Ima just take a sneakie selfie… no one will see.
3. Oh god did those dudes in the car behind me just see?

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4. There is no car behind me! HA!
5. Sweet mother of a dingo’s baby I look tired… Oh man I’m so tired.
6. Since when is my face so asymmetrical?
7. Ugggghhhh this is boring.

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8. Oh looks like Jordan is in front of me, I wonder what he’s doing?
9. Probably buying coffee DUHHHHH!
10. Do kids still say duh? Or der? Or some other kind of sarcastic noise?
11. It is SO not cold enough for this vest.
12. I wish it was cold enough for this vest.
13. ‘Seeeeee my VEST! See my VEST! Made from real gorilla chest‘ *snort*
14. Mr Burns is misunderstood.
15. Am I going to be late for the morning meeting?
16. Crap. My phone is only on 1%.
17. Maybe I should learn Spanish?
18. Is ‘hola’ pronounced ‘hola’ or ‘ola’?
19. I think I liked Ashton Kutcher more when he was with Demi.
20. Did I brush my teeth this morning….? Bin juice breath…
21. I wonder if only eating gelati would make me lose weight?
22. My turn to order! THANK GOD. Or you know, whoever.
23. I really hope they have those tiny cookies today.
24. Better take another selfie.

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25. Dem crazy eyez.
26. I’m definitely four minutes late.
27. I wonder if human taxidermy is a thing?
28. What day is it?
29. Maybe I should just eat a jar of olives for dinner.
30. TIME FOR WORK.

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Introducing Charlie

You’ve probably seen Charlie before, here or here or here or here. But I’ve never told his story, which deserves to be told because this pooch has come a long way.

Without wanting to sound crass, all of our pets have been ‘fixer-uperers’. Pound pooches. Preloved. RSPCA rescues. You get the picture. The thing with second-hand pets is they come with quirks.

Our first pet was a former (we prefer not to use the term ‘washed up’) show cat called Wilbur who won ribbons for having the longest whiskers. When Wilbur first arrived he fled to the safety of underneath my parents’ bed in terror, where I, by all means a relatively stupid four-year-old tried to coax him out with his kitty litter tray. I think I thought it was his food. Needless to say it didn’t work. Eventually Wilbur rediscovered his feline aloofness and allowed us to love him for the next 14 or so years.

Lexie, our first dog, was a Whippet Dalmatian cross from the RSPCA. Lexie was as clever as she was disobedient. She loved running away and would often turn and watch you chasing after her with a glint of glee in her beady eyeball before tearing off again. One time she ate an entire side of smoked salmon and another time an entire bag of ratsak, and survived. We eventually got a dog trainer in to sort her out and she magically transformed into Lassie for an hour, before turning back into her ratbag self as soon as the Bark Busters van backed out of our driveway.

Then there was Jack, the geriatric Jack Russel who adored Mum and nobody else, probably because she fed him bacon. He was a sweet but slightly cranky old man.

Anyway, all of these much loved pets eventually passed away (poor Lexi, who couldn’t be done in by poison, died of cancer). Mum swore she couldn’t have another pet for a while but then heard the plight of Charlie.

Charlie was owned by a family who kept him alone in a dark windowless shed. He was fed, but not loved. His fur was left to grow to the point where his paws were completely encased by matted hair and he could barely see. She scooped him up, flicked his former family the bird (that part is a lie) and took him home.

He was so scared he wouldn’t go near Mum and she had to chase him and earn his trust with food. Charlie has an intense fear of scissors, no doubt from being roughly clipped in the dark shed, and had to be sedated for his first haircut.

By the time I met Charlie, he had a clipped ‘do, happier outlook and a rather dapper hoodie:

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He hesitated for a moment before leaping into my lap and wagging his fluffy little tail hard (notice how it’s out of focus in the above photo?).

Charlie loves going for rides in the car:

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And having good nap on the arm chair:

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He loves baths:

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And cuddling:

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He doesn’t like having to jostle for space at the foot of Mum’s bed:

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And having been photographed by me for much of his short life, he also seems to have started hating cameras:

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Charlie is by no means perfect, but he has come so far in such a short time. I hate to think where he’d be if Mum hadn’t rescued him. He’s the sweetest little hound. You should certainly consider a pound pooch for your next pet, they are a bit more work but so worth it.

Do you have a dog or cat? New or fixer-uperer?

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What it feels like to be hypnotised

Yesterday Bec and I were hypnotised by renowned hypnotist Matthew Hale on live radio. We volunteered ourselves for the segment on the Mornings program a week ago and were really excited until it actually dawned on us that we had no idea what would be involved. I think you can sense the apprehension in this photo:

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Anyway, after a relatively normal morning at work Matthew and his crew arrived to do an ‘induction’ before we went into the studio. This involved him getting us to relax and focus on things like the weight of our hands on our lap, or on our feet. It was a lot like meditating. He would also count backwards, each time getting us to relax further into hypnosis. And it turns out hypnosis actually feels really good! He ‘brought us back’ and we headed into the studio,  and this is what happened (thanks to Nat who filmed this on my phone)…

You are aware of what is happening, it’s kind of like you are in a daydream and anything suggested to you just makes sense. So it made sense to us to laugh away. And I genuinely thought Kirstyn reading the weather was utterly hilarious… Afterwards I felt really relaxed and kind of tired.

Last night we went to see Matthew’s 90 minute show at the Arts Centre and it was incredible. He hypnotised about 20 people and the things they said and did were beyond amazing. Bec and I recognised a lot of what he was saying and as we was doing the induction with the volunteers on stage I actually started to feel myself relaxing into it. If I felt tired after 5 minutes of being hypnotised I have no idea how these guys must have felt after a full 90 minutes!

If you have the chance to be hypnotised or see a legit hypnotist show definitely do it. The only disappointment was that apparently people sleep really well after being hypnotised, I did not. My insomnia lives on, 6 months and counting…

And no, he didn’t have us or anyone clucking like chickens.

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Sibling Rivalry

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(Thanks to Mum for the above matching batik pattern two-piece ensembles) 

I was reading an article on Mamamia today about sibling rivalry, particularly between sisters. So I took a little trip down memory lane. As a general rule my sister, who is three years older, and I got along pretty well as children.

But when we were growing up, the list of things I was jealous my sister had that I didn’t included (but was not limited to) the following:

– Appendicitis
– Major surgery and its associated gifts, flowers, time off school and attention
– A leg injury and its associated full leg cast, gifts, flowers, time off school and attention
– Sharp academic abilities and entry into a selective entry school
– Athletic prowess on the basketball court
– A lower Body Mass Index
– A tertiary enter score in the high 90s
– A law degree (that one is probably too recent to be classed as childhood jealousy…)

As far as I was concerned, she got everything and I got nothing. And it was SO unfair. She was the Dottie and I was the Kit. Ha! With the benefit of hindsight I am rather pleased that I wasn’t the first born and didn’t have to suffer through the tough parenting era. I was a better nagger and generally ended up with more presents. Plus I was more successful as a tween model.

But I will never forget the searing heat of jealously that waves over a child who feels like they’ve been hard done by. It’s amazing really, how such small beings can experience such extreme anger and emotion. Thankfully, that anger rarely boiled over into physical violence in our case. Except there was one incident when I pushed my sister over as we both tried to exit a doorway at the same time after a fight in the kitchen. Her aforementioned low BMI meant I won that tussle.  And (embarrassingly) just a few short years ago my sister whipped the hair-tie out of my hair when I sat in front of her in the car. Such maturity. Also I just remembered that when I was about four I scratched her on the nose and I believe she still bears the scar…

Despite all this my sister and I are about as close as two siblings can be. Especially considering we have lived countries and cities apart for the better part of the last five years.

Did you/do you get along with your siblings? My Dad and his brothers are still completely insufferable. Our family get-togethers are like The Hunger Games.  

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